(Continue...)

The next day, Len couldn’t concentrate at school at all. His mind was on Rin, imagining her finally able to walk and remembered the warm and soft smile she gave the previous night, it was even prettier than the only smile she gave Len when they first met. It was a content smile like she smiled from her heart. But that smile was not for Len who always bully her, it was for the stranger who always comfort her.

That night, Len sneaked again into the hospital imagining Rin would greet him by jumping to him. But imaginary is imaginary, if it were to come true, it isn’t human to decide. Len instead found Rin crying harder and louder than before. Len’s heart missed a beat, maybe more. He prayed nothing went wrong as he approached her and patted her head.

[Please… Let everything be okay. Please, let me worry of paltry things. Don’t let her suffer anymore… Please…]

Feeling a pat on her head, Rin immediately hugged the boy and cried on his shoulder. Sobbing and huskily she told him about her worsen condition, about her paralyzed feet…

…… That night was spent in tears and Rin cursing Len, wanting him to be dead and all. Len knew he should be dead if it were to come to this. If only he never alive, Rin wouldn't lose her sight. If only he never alive, she wouldn't lose her hearing. If only he never alive, she wouldn't lose her feet. Everything and each of Rin’s misery were his responsibility.

“I hate him! I hate, Len!”
“I love you, Rin.”
“If only he just die! I hope he died!”
“I really love you, Rin.”
“Why can’t he just die? Why can’t he leave me? Why he always give me misery?”
“I love you with all my life.”

Tears shed by Len were as much as Rin’s wetting his shirt in his embrace but he tried not to let his tears touch her. He whispered the unheard confession to her ears over and over again along with his sorry. But just like what her father said to him before, neither things he did could safe her.

“I want to see again! I want to hear again! I want to walk again!” Rin kept on repeating until she fell asleep with the tears still in her eyes.

It was a beautiful day. The sun was shining. The wind was blowing. The flowers were blossoming. The birds were chirping. Len peeped from behind a tree as Rin’s parents pushed the wheelchair where Rin was now sitting. Rin was finally able to go home. The beautiful day seemed like congratulating her but she couldn’t see it and it was because of him, he recognized it very well. Rin was singing. Len heard her voice was not suitable to sing any kind of song anymore. It was husky and hard. Then Rin cried, her mother wiped her tears while her father wrote something on her palm and from the situation, he probably told her she sang beautifully, of course it was a lie. Len banged his head to the tree trunk. It was his fault that even her father had to lie about her voice. Once the family went away, Len entered the hospital and met Rin’s doctor. The only thing he could do.

“Doctor, is it possible to donate my eyes for Rin?”

Len went back home very late that night and when he got home he was welcomed by his parents, looking so worried. They told him that Rin’s parents had sued him for the accident happened to their daughter and they brought the case to the court. Len, upon hearing, was so shocked. He never though her parents would even go to the court but he though he deserved it. Taking away one’s ability to enjoy color and sound and even as far as to paralyzing them is crueler than killing them. Len had now gone lower than a cold blooded killer.

Len went to his room very depressed over his unforgivable sin. The court was nothing to him even if he should go to jail, they really were nothing to him compared to his guilt over Rin, the girl he loved and also the one he made blind, deaf, and paralyze. And that girl, Rin, was now staring into emptiness near her opened window. Len saw her as her room was just across his. Rin was all alone in her room. Len really wanted to hold her tight right now. He climbed off his window to the tree in front of the window and crossed to Rin’s room. He patted her head.

(To be continued...)